chainsawriot's Diaryland Diary

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everything that has a beginning has an end

everything that has a beginning has an end

11:07 - Monday, Nov. 17, 2003

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b/w

這星期我回到最初的工作地點工作,就是那睡眠實驗室。

之前被迫搬遷到秘書室,今個星期因為「大RA」放假,我頂替她的工作,故我可以回到那裡。

那裡有一部好勁的Hi Fi,所以我將我的iPod接到那部Hi Fi,整天都在播放Nirvana, Linkin Park等。平日醫生出出入入的實驗室,因為我的音樂播放而變得十分冷清。

明天要搬回秘書室工作,又要展開悶人的工作了。

這幾天看了些電影。

如The Others, Gladiator, Transpotting等等。還有四分之一套差利卓別靈的「城市之光」(City light 1931)。

那個四十來歲的女人說:「差利,我看過啦,無無聊聊咁。」

片播了十分鐘,另一十來歲的少女說:「以前的人真慘,要看這樣的戲。」

差利多套默片,我最愛的是「城市之光」,之後才是最近被數碼修補好的「摩登時代」。

原因是那個簡單的煽情故事:盲女,差利努力賺錢給她醫眼,醫好,盲女不認得他。太像某個人的故事,但願她不是盲的。

默片是另一種的Art Form,給人很多的想像空間。我想是現代人太難滿足吧。我記得我第一次看差利是八歲,但愛上黑白電影,是大學的事。

不喜歡彩色的世界,太過現實,要求太高。

黑白,簡單,直接,沒有太多的修飾。不言之間,能表達更多的東西。

舊如沒有聲的德國表現主義先鋒電影Das Kabinett des Doktor Caligari(1919)的奇異背景,到Metropolis(1926)的開創性,到Casablanca(1942) Bogart煙不離口的有形有格,以至The Killing (1956)stanley Kubrick的佈局,,也多麼令人難忘。

有時我也在想,到底是現代人慾望太多,要求太高比較慘;還是數十年前享受不多,技術有限慘一點。

02:45 - Friday, Nov. 14, 2003

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190

I earn 190 dollars in average everyday.

30 dollars a day for the interest of the debt I own.

160 left.

10 dollars a day for the breakfast. 20 dollars for her feed and miscellaneous thing she need to buy for her academic..

130 left.

100 a day to pay off the debt.

30 left.

20 a day to be saved for her tutition fee.

10 left.

5 for devaluation of the things I have after I make the bad decision.

5 left.

1 dollar for aging, 1 dollar for killing all the interests, 1 dollars for my patient, 1 dollars for respect.

1 dollars left.

What can I do with this one dollars?

Buying the nearly nothing self-esteem?

19:42 - Thursday, Nov. 13, 2003

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a short description or heading for this entry

Weblogger is pathetic.

http://mama.indstate.edu/users/bones/WhyIHateWebLogs.html

08:37 - Thursday, Nov. 13, 2003

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Video Kill The Radio Star

本來有一大段打好了。

心情複雜,不知怎的。

最後決定不貼。

So why did I do it? I could offer a million answers, all false. The truth is that I'm a bad person, but that's going to change, I'm going to change. This is the last of this sort of thing. I'm cleaning up and I'm moving on, going straight and choosing life. I'm looking forward to it already. I'm going to be just like you: the job, the family, the fucking big television, the washing machine, the car, the compact disc and electrical tin opener, good health, low cholesterol, dental insurance, mortgage, starter home, leisurewear, luggage, three-piece suite, DIY, game shows, junk food, children, walks in the park, nine to five, good at golf, washing the car, choice of sweaters, family Christmas, indexed pension, tax exemption, clearing the gutters, getting by, looking ahead, to the day you die.

Renton - from Transpotting

23:57 - Tuesday, Nov. 11, 2003

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自古好人死得早

This is one of the most satisfactory photo I ever taken in my life.

Click for the larger one.

21:25 - Sunday, Nov. 09, 2003

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`332441`43535

It have been 40 days.

I haven't back to my real home in Yuen Long for 40 days, bloody forty days.

I really wanna escape from the current place and back to there. The feeling of living in this place is too fragile and anger-filled.

Every time when I feel down, I recognized the sweet and warm feeling my family bring me. Everything are started by a wrong decision. All of them, are started by a core problem. You know, there is a croc next to my home. Also, there is a fatal JE (Japanese encephallitis) case in the Fairview Park, the big villa next to my home village.

All of them happened in that fucking 40 days. Tai Sang Wai will forever be my home. No matter what happen. Yeah, I am too naive and close-minded. I don't have any international mind or business mind. I am just a simple villager. I hate the so-called open-minded people. fuck them.

Don't apply your thinking as the basis to blame me for anything.

You can't blame a farmer to choose farming as his career.

20:51 - Sunday, Nov. 09, 2003

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Morgan

Nokia "innovative" handheld console cum cellphone is a really "cool" product.

At least, people around the world react very actively towards the side-talking architecture of that phone.

Nikitac produce a sidetalking photo with a mini beatmania. I react to the sidetalking by using a raw chinese product.

Watched matrix: revolution last night. The CG is great. The mechanical war scene make me think about the 90s-ized 80s sci-fi movie. A lot of bullet, somehow violent.

I don't really like the Neo vs agent smith scene. It's a the fight scene in DBZ-style. I think that scene is not supervised by Yuen Woo Ping. I am not sure, I just guessing.

I don't like the ending as well.

But, I like the scene 2 women fight against the big drillers. That's 2 woman pretty like Ripley in Alien.

Revolution is a aesthetic mix of a action film, sci-fi and war film.

Before the night of Matrix, I watched The Shawshank Redemption. Sad, but positive story.

I watched plenty of Morgan freeman's movies. Most of them are good. Trust me, he is a good actor. Maybe, it is because he is a actor that refuse to have any romantic scene/love scene with women.

10:18 - Saturday, Nov. 08, 2003

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食呢行飯

最近很喜歡聽New Order,最喜歡的是來自Technique大碟的Round & Round,那些Synthesizer的運用,成了日後上至Epic Trance,下至芭樂Eurobeat跳舞歌的標準。昨晚與nikitac談到New Order,她最喜歡的是Bizarre Triangle Love,由其是收錄在Single的加長跳舞版。「加長跳舞版」,令我想起noon D時代,那些五顏六色的廣東歌Vinyl。我在元朗的家也收藏了「愛情陷阱」的「加長跳舞版」。

New order和Joy Division,同一堆人,卻具有同樣的影響力。我想NO是唯一可以紅兩次的樂隊。如Billy Corgan的Zwan,又或者Krist Noveselic的Sweet 75,都不能紅兩次。所以,我有時會懷疑,Joy Division的成員是外星人。

Ian Curtis的死,是在五月十八日。Joy Division對我的影響不太深。可是NO的歌,覺得相逢恨晚。

13:52 - Wednesday, Nov. 05, 2003

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Explicit Content

I think some of you should read the news about a ex-microsoft temp employee was fired by Microsoft because he post a photo of a bunch of G5 Power Mac delivered to Redmond office in his blog.

I am so pissed off with the illogical opinions in imacguru. Yeah, Microsoft is the evil empire, she earn a lot yearly and produce buggy softwares for quick money. Hey! Mac Users, you should be grateful that you haven't suffer much from Microsoft. The opinion in iMacguru is solely based on the cultural war of Mac users and Microsoft, but not the fact.

No matter you work in DOD in Pentagon, Kwong Wah Hospital, Apple computer or even a small furniture company, if you do the similar things like that ex-microsoft staff, you may probably get fired. Without any official permission, it is not ethical to expose or reproduce any sensitive information of your employer to the public. Sensitive information including R&D information, prototype of products or even financial report. That should be listed clearly in the employment contract.

Some company may give the employee a chance, but some don't. The company that don't give their employee a chance is ethical, since they need to assure their company policy.

Anyway, I think the impulsive opinions in iMacguru is very navie and impractically. One may consider those opinion as noise. Just like the PRC government consider my site as "explicit content" and filtered my blog from the Chinese Netizens.

17:23 - Monday, Nov. 03, 2003

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